Yesterday I reflected on a few verses from "I Dreamed a Dream", the banner song from Les Misérables. Songs like that one have such a way of bringing out the rawest of our emotions and experiences. I love the way that music embodies such poetic expression. Today I would like to pick up my story where I left off by reflecting on another song from a different musical. I saw "Man of La Mancha" on Broadway in 1968, months before I was drafted into military service. Its song, The Impossible Dream, was the dream that died for me when Ellen died. It came alive when I started to live it. Here are a few thoughts about it ...
To dream ... the impossible dream ...
I have always been an ideological windmill fighter. When I was young it got me in trouble.
To fight ... the unbeatable foe ...
It took me years to understand that there are fights not worth fighting. Battles that could not be won.
To bear ... with unbearable sorrow ...
Years ago I broke down crying when I heard that verse sung. I remarried after Ellen died. Our first eight years of marriage were so wonderful. Then Ann was hit with a disabling disease that devastated us. These past years have been filled with sorrow that at times seems so unbearable.
To run ... where the brave dare not go ...
I never knew how ordinary and common bravery could appear. My wife is one of the most courageous people I know. Watching her persevere in suffering is so inspirational. I so admire her.
To right ... the unrightable wrong ...
I have learned that righting wrongs is all about forgiveness and letting go of the past.
To love ... pure and chaste from afar ...
This speaks to me of unconditional love. To love with no expectation of love returned.
To try ... when your arms are too weary ...
Arthritis has hit my joints. I remember this verse and fight through the pain.
To reach ... the unreachable star ...
This verse reminds me of a verse in the bible that says this about people of faith:
They were stoned, sawed apart, murdered with the sword; they went about in sheepskins and goatskins; they were destitute, afflicted, ill-treated (the world was not worthy of them); they wandered in deserts and mountains and caves and openings in the earth. And these all were commended for their faith, yet they did not receive what was promised.
Godly dreams are meant to shape us. These dreams are always impossible in nature because we need God to see them become reality. With God we can: defeat the unbeatable foe; bear with unbearable sorrow; run with courage; right the unrightable wrong; love as He does; and try when our bodies are too weary. This is the dream that I still embrace. I guess I am still a windmill fighter.
What an amazing and difficult journey you have been on.
ReplyDeleteNo platitudes or saying I know how you feel, for I can't walk in your shoes.
We all seem to be fighting our own windmills.
I don't know what I would do without the Lord going before me and beside me too.
I never stopped to really read the words of this song.
Absolutely powerful.
I need to keep on dreaming and keep on keeping on.
(((hugs)))
to both you and Ann.
Thanks so much Sue. Encouragement from friends like you really help!
DeleteThere's a line in a song by Todd Agnew: "It's hard to trust your dreams are so much better than mine." Keep seeking God's dream. I'm praying for you and Ann. Let me know how things are going.
ReplyDelete